Guess I got up on the wrong side of the bed
when I shoulda stayed in it instead.
But I gotta go to work ’cause I love it
Oh how I wanna tell the boss to shove it
No matter how I want to crash
Need abundance of funds when it comes to cash.
So I wash my face with a little bit of water
to wake me up
(’Does it work?’ ‘Yeah, sorta..’)
Inspect the reflection, check my eyes -
they’re bloodshot, that’s no surprise.
So I wake up every day the same way,
no matter what time I hit the hay
Fall asleep at like seven o’clock
and I wake up tired wearing dirty socks, thinking.

I love (I love work)
Work (I love work)
I love (Geez, I love work)
Work

Put my shoes on, strap them up,
Put on my shorts, scratch my nut,
Put on my shirt, get something to eat
and then I’m out the door and I’m into the street.
Driving my car, still putting my clothes on,
When I realise I left the stove on.
I’m gonna be late if I have to go home,
But I got no choice so I’ll bust a U-bone
at the buisiest intersection,
probably starting to wish that I’d slept in -
’cause now a cop is pulling me over,
and I’m quite sure that I’m not quite sober.
But he’s happy just giving me a ticket
when he pisses off I’m gonna flick it
out the window and go to work wired
Hope I don’t get fired for being so tired.
A quarter to is when i’m supposed to start,
but I’m looking at my watch and it’s quarter past.
Boss’s telling me to get off my ass,
but it’s against my religion to be working fast.
So I said another company has made some offers,
if you want me to stay, ‘I need a new office!’
He’s fuming and foaming at the mouth
when he reminded of the stove at my house.
Never went back to turn it off
because I got sidetracked, interacting with the cop,
I’m telling my boss how a fire might burn my house and my stuff and the money that I’ve earned.
Thought it was a lie, wouldn’t let me go home,
so I quit my job to save everything I own.
Bust him in the eye and called him a jerk
When it got me to thinking - I love work.

I love (I love work)
Work (I love work)
I love (Geez, I love work)
Work

Speeding home, I got pulled over again,
by the same cop saying, ‘Well if it isn’t my old friend!’
Looked him in the eye, told him the truth -
so he came to my house to check the proof.
And there’s the roof, fully ablaze;
I guess I’m just having one of those days.
I lost my job, my house burned down,
and I got two tickets from the same clown.
All my memories are up in smoke,
All my enemies are fucking stoked,
‘Cause now I’ve got nothing left
and I can’t even collect a counter check,
because for that, you need ID,
and the Centrelink staff don’t recognise me.
Still have a hangover, my head hurts,
but none of this would have happened if I didn’t go to work.

Now I wake up in the afternoon,
Hardly ever even leave my room,
unless I need to shit or piss
or eat something, ’cause I don’t wanna miss
Jerry Springer, Ricki Lake;
I don’t wanna clean the mess that I make.
I’m allowed and proud to be a slob -
it’s all part of the parcel of my new job.
I can wake up with serious bed hair,
I don’t brush it, it just sits there.
the main concern is I get enough sleep
and I hand my form in every couple of weeks,
cos the government pays for me to stay home
and I much prefer to be on my own.
I got tired of being a clerk
but now - I love work.

I love (I love work)
Work (I love work)
I love (Geez, I love work)
Work

~I love work
Butterfingers